Back in October 2013 I had an accident which changed the course of my life forever. (READ ABOUT) Back at that time I was 5 months pregnant. I really started to struggle with pain, and lack of mobility. Within 2 months I had to use crutches to walk from the house to the car, I had to crawl up the stairs to have a bath, which was the only way I got any pain relief at the time, and I literally had to role out of bed to get up. It was a pretty intense time. My whole life went from an active busy farmers daughter to a baby making machine, who could only just about make tea for everyone. Although things looked bleak, I always believed I would get better and I would be fine.
There were however people in my life back then that didn’t have my faith. I guess though to give them some credit they were probably trying to prepare me for the worst. Which would have been my mobility continuing to spiral, and ending up in a wheelchair for the rest of my life. 4 months past and I gave birth to Hayley in March 2014. By a sheer miracle and all the drugs I could possibly get I was able to have her naturally, which was the best thing for her and I in the end. Her birth was actually just amazing and one I look back on with good memories not bad.
I walked out of the hospital on crutches blissfully unaware of the journey I was about to embark on. Not only as a new mum but also an incredibly physically, broken women. The midwife had said to me that I had a severe case of SPD (symphysis pubis dysfunction) or PGP (Pelvic Girdle Pain). Most suffers recover within 6-8 weeks of birth. Great! So I thought. 6 weeks came and went, and I was still no better. Of course there was those good intentional people starting to think that I was probably not going to get any better, and were voicing that over me. The words we speak over people have so much power, if only everyone knew that. Comments I was getting were things like, you maybe on them for ever, will you need a new hip by the time you are 30? My family however being supportively silent because they were experiencing the struggle with me. It was all very real for them especially mum having to get me out of bed, push the push chair and even get Hayley out of bed some days.
Somewhere though was this small quiet voice inside of me, that I now know to be the voice of God, which kept saying you will get better, you are going to get better it is just going to take time, and you are going to have to start looking after yourself, and putting you first. What? What does looking after myself look like? Before this, I was the kind of women that everyone asked to help, because I liked to keep busy. So it started with me joining Tropic and using their skin care every day. Those 5 minutes of luxury which I indulged in both morning and evenings, set me on a learning to love me journey. The smells uplifted me, the feeling of my skin was like nothing I had ever felt before, I still get those feelings, 6 years on. The money I was earning was also giving me the drive to start seeking help for my body, no matter what the cost. And cost it did, it still does.
I needed to do this for me, but more importantly I needed to do this for Hayley and Andrew as well, I was a right old bag to live with. If you are a sufferer of daily pain, you will know how grouchy it makes you. So, I needed to find the answer to all the questions I was asking in my heart, but was completely unaware of. Looking back now I can see all the miracles that have happened to me, and still continue to happen. It was all because I had a little faith, in myself and in the sheer fact I believed with all of my heart that there had to be more to life than the reality I was living.
7 years on I am still on the journey however I have come miles! I not only had to start noticing I had to look after my physical body. I also realised I had a mental health, emotional health, and even spiritual health. These 4 elements were supposed to work in balance to give me optimum health. That was just not the case, it is now though. I am still believing for my physical body to drop the weight that it carries, which it put down to protect me. And to get into balance or harmony, particularly in my hormones, every month I see the difference in them. By the end of this year the physical body changes will be evident. Sounds impossible right? Well if I was trying to work it all out myself then it would be. However, when you get Jesus on your side, the impossible starts to become possible.
I always believed I would improve from what I was like in 2014, and I have. I can walk, run, even jump on a trampoline. My love of dancing is also starting to come back to the surface from where ever I stored it deep in my heart. I believed by faith for my healing I have also believed by faith for my grans healing over the last 3 years. Who after 2 severe mental health “blips” I like to call them, which everyone was saying was dementia, because of her age and weren’t expecting her to recover. I believed by faith that she would be healed, in fact God spoke very clearly to me one day and said, I will heal your gran on 75% of your faith and the final 25% she will be able to do herself. And she has, she is a different woman, in an amazing way.
Miracles happen, and the truth is we all have the small quiet voice helping us. We just make the noises of life so loud we can’t hear it. When we can’t hear it, we don’t have hope. When we have no hope, it can lead us to death, and destruction of ourselves and our lives.
I am writing this to give you hope, there is an answer to every question you have and it is in the person of Jesus. You may not think it is, I never used to either. I would go as far as saying I hated Jesus. But my life now is living proof that when you have the love of God through Jesus working in your life amazing things happen. The tiniest little miracles I have working in my day, like when the parking angel saves me the perfect space in the car park. Or when a car pulls out in front of me, and I actually have no idea how we didn’t crash. Other than the belief that and angel of God was with us that day. I have millions of answers to prayer and miracles in my life.
I believed by faith for a better, more fulfilling life and I am willing to believe by faith for a life like that for you and your family as well. It starts with you asking the questions, is there more to life than this? Am I missing something?
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